You're my little dorito
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
