Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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