Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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