Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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