wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
