Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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