After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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