:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i think i scared a bird with my dick
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Randomize