We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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