Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Randomize
