Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
