he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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