Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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