I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
