My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
