I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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