I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
