she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Randomize
