I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
