So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
