he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
