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So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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