is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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