Non-Jews are for practice
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
