Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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