Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
