belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
