so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
