Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
