His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize