??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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