Define "chronic" masturbator.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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