I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
