no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
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