Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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