Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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