do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
