It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
