it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize