She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
