Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
