Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
