Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
