hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
