If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Randomize
