it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
