Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
