return my video game
Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
This toilet bowl is my home.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
