wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Randomize
