Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
