This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
