What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Randomize
